December 23, 2003
rainy.. raw swell

whattup all y'all peoples! I didn't check it this morning.. i came into work super early so that i could leave early.. I might snoop my head around this afternoon before my flight to philly-town leaves the ground. hrrmm... but.. the Lindy cam looks pretty inviting right now... soo you could probably score waves there for the next few hours. There is a gigantic 8ft high tide around noon today... which i guess coincides with the minimal (new) moon?? Anybody know if/how the full or new moons cause extreme tides. I mean.. just because the moon is full doesn't necessarily mean it's closer to the earth and therefor exerting more gravitational pull.. does it?

ermm.. yeah.. soo i'll be on the east coast until Jan 4. I'll probably give a few east coast updates but i won'd be surfing.. soo.. e's surf report will most likely be in hibernation unless you cats want to just keep discussing on today's discussion board..

It sounds like many of you had a blast at OB this weekend.. And also were a bit perplexed by the anti-OB sentiment expressed by myself and others about the conditions there. I just want to say it for the record.. that while I live 3 blocks from OB and surf there as much as i can, on many many many days (like last weekend) I would MUCH rather surf a mellower location that breaks in the same spot every time and is fun and easy. Call me (and others) wimps, spineless pansies, sack-less eunuchs, babies, kooks, whatever.. I'm just not into the bravado or masochism of putting myself into scary, marginal, hammering conditions if i think i'm going to get more face-time at another spot. Three cheers to all you guys and ladies (judith!) who enjoy taking 40 or 50 brutal walls of whitewater on the head while paddling out just to get into position for that one double-overhead glory wave. If i had to pick one type of condition for every surf session for the rest of my life i'd choose glassy, barrelly, head-high, 4ft 13sec, slight offshore winds, sunny, tons of A-frames breaking throughout the whole beach, people getting barrelled left and right, everything breaking on the inner bars, Jimi Hendrix set up on the beach with a huge amplification system.. belting out celestial guitar solos to all us surfers while we attempt to shralp the place to shreds, maybe 3 or 4 guys per peak.. enough to provide a little communal stoke factor but not nearly enough to clog the situation with too many heads, videographers and photographers swimming and on land, documenting everyone's best rides, just as many lady shredders as guys out in the lineup, whales, dolphins, seals out there frolicking and catching waves. Linda Mar breaking good for all the newbies and super-mellowers.

oh yeah.. i tallied my days/session for 2003
217 - total days surfed
240 - total sessions

have a good holiday break. remember to drink that extra martini, eat that extra sugar cookie, give your granny that extra hug, watch that extra late-night flick, catch that extra wave, fart that feel-good fart, just generally enjoy yourselves and let all the people you love know that ya love em!


paul ferraris snapped some gems of OB on "big Wednesday!"

Posted by Ethan at 09:13 AM
December 22, 2003
not bad.. a few waves to be had

OB again looking dismal. The ol' dog just hasn't been working these last few days. I saw one longboarder sitting way outside as i drove back toward my house but the rideable waves looked infrequent, mushy and relatively difficult to track down. Lerm and i headed south toward P-town. We tried to get lucky at Smoke-a-Jay, where i scored point-break-like rights all weekend... but.. flatness pervaded the cove.. Soo.. feeling generally anti-Lindy of late we decided to head back up to Sharp Park, based on the fact that we both noticed seemingly well-shaped waves peeling and breaking near the pier. However, upon closer inspection it became obvious that steep, thick, frightening waves were thumping and exploding very close to the beach. Most waves closed-out and it looked very threatening and scary out there.. Soo.. it's fast approaching 7:30 at this point and not wanting to get skunked, we decide to drive down to Linda Mar and jump in no matter what. Sure enough we crest the hill, look over the guardrail and watch glassy, shoulder-high waves peel and beckon! Fuck!! We both look at each other in the parking lot and think, "It's On!!" Speed into the wetty and sprint out to the lineup. Lots of lulls out there but also a fair number of rideable waves cruising in. I nabbed about 10 rides.. mostly on the far inside. Most of my rides were of the mushy, cruisy variety.. but it was fun to just glide and meander along with the softly tapering waves. I did also latch into one big, peeling, rifling set wave that pretty much made my morning. While running from my car i notices what looked like a semi-consistent sandbar with a little crowd of dudes sitting out there.. i paddled out to the inside of them.. caught a few that rolled by their outside position.. then, with some subtlety, paddled out and sat a bit deeper than the pack.. and sure enough.. this big set rolls on through.. I let the first wave go so that the pack of dudes wouldn't feel it a breach of etiquette that i paddled deeper than them and then snagged the first set wave.. but.. on the second set wave i took off and then raced this ledging, offshore-propped wall for maybe 4 or 5 pumps.. then did some long turns as the waves slowed down on the inside.. then ended my ride right on the sand! fun! I've really been working on trying to simply ride the wave as opposed to forcing turns and willing maneuvers. I'm trying to be more in tune with the natural contours and speed-pockets of the wave. I'd like the maneuvers and turns i make to be more based on a translation of these wave nuances.


oh yeah.. i surfed for 5 hours on saturday!! then again for almost 3 hours yesterday.. If you were one of the people who shared the lineup with me on saturday evening.. thanks for the good vibes! One sucky thing occured, though, BBR got purposefully dropped in on by one of the more vocal surfers on this one set wave. It was kind-of a bummer to feel the anti-bodyboard vibe.. as i think that's why this one guy dropped in. That sucks BBR!! But.. as the tide switched and the sky began to grow dark.. almost everybody paddled in.. with the exception of me and this one other guy. we ended up trading waves for the last hour of daylight. While most of the session i was picking scraps on the inside, avoiding the crusty local guys, trying to be crafty. now we were simply sitting on the peak and taking turns on the biggest waves that came through! Laughing about it! so lucky!!

Andy Irons won the pipeline masters and in doing so (and beating slater) is now back-to-back world champion. He's a cocky mother fucker.. but.. his surfing is no joke!


Santa Cruz yesterday (Stinkeye's pics)

Posted by Ethan at 10:35 AM
December 19, 2003
swell down.. good waves somewhere??

I psyched myself up last night. I don't know why, but i was just really looking forward to surfing this morning.. Starting at around 4:45am i began waking up every 20 minutes or so.. just kind-of anxious and excited about getting some waves. Finally 6:40 rolled around.. Robme and i headed to Sloat.. where conditions approached doable but weren't nearly the radiant sweetness of yesterday.. huh.. maybe pacifica we thought.. but.. total flatness at Rockaway and near flatness at the 'mar. We almost bailed on surfing altogether but ended up paddling out at the semi-crowded north end of Lindy. Every few minutes a set of 4 or 5 waves rose up from the depths and either peeled or closed-out. One guy with a red helmet and a red board with full traction pad somehow caught most of the best sections that came through and looked to be having a great session.. the rest of the schmoes out there, me included, barely caught squat. It was a frustrating session for me and left me a little sour. I had one good left with a bottom turn and top turn but otherwise just kooked all over the place, botching a few drops, not going on a wave i should have gone on, getting caught inside by two sets and duckdiving/paddling for what seemed like eternities to get back outside.. at which time the ocean would go flat... and i'd begin inching inside again to try to catch a wave.. until the next set would come and pummel me with about 5 waves.. but not before i'd watch the guy with the red helmet catch a tasty one. arggh!!! but.. such is surfing.. ya get your great days (yesterday!) and you get your shitty days... then you get your shitty days were you also surf like shite!!!

oh well..

anybody score?


jalama looking north - photos from

rob gilley photo of Rincon

Posted by Ethan at 10:37 AM
December 18, 2003
swell down.. fun up!

Expecting another day of gigantor surf i borrowed Robme's 7'5" mini-gun last night. Jake, Lerm and i met at VFers at sunrise. Surprisingly it was MUCH smaller today, though every 10 minutes or so a solid DOH set would mushily break on the outer bars. The only two wave-riders out there were two skillful kayakers (wave-skiers?) who were successfully catching and shredding the long, peeling, burgery faces. We sat and deliberated and hemmed and hawed about this attractive-looking inside right just in front of the beach chalet.. In between sets we watched nicely-shaped, head-high rights grind and barrel and spit in this one spot. Hmmm... At one point we actually started to take our wetsuits out of the car.. but then we watched a true set come in and reak havoc on the spot we had our eyes on.. Hmm... soo.... back in the car.. past sloat which looked kinda similar.. real mushy on the outside bars and then harrowing, thumping closeouts on the inside.. a few guys paddling out.. We kept driving down into San Mateo County.. checked a few offshore-groomed locations.. then finally settled on this little, covy right that was working kind-of like 4-mile on a mediocre day. nobody out. The three of us each caught a handful of super-enjoyable, mellow, head-high, peeling rights before a few more folks paddled out. Still there was a constant influx of rideable waves and everybody seemed pretty stoked.. I actually caught more waves than i did duckdives!!! Maybe about 12 or 15 rides and only about 4 or 5 duckdives!!! It was nice to work on some down-the-line carving and just generally having some consistent open faces on which to move, react, dance, meld. Super fun and basically just what the doctor ordered!!!

on the way back to town we drove by Sloat and it looked RIDICULOUSLY, shockingly good!! We watched a few double-overhead+, offshore-licked A-frames cascade and peel in both directions, with riders barely making the drops and then tracking strait paths down the line.. big wave styleee.. it looked really fun and if i didn't have to get to work i would have re-suited up and given that mini-gun a spin.. but.. hopefully they'll be some juice left tomorrow.

it was great to chill with Jake for a bit.. The dude is just coming off a soul-searching 5 weeks in Indo (bali, lombok) and is now planning a central american assault. Damn! that's what's up!

sorry for the late report.. i'm running a bit late today..



some shots of Mavs from yesterday from Roy Toft (thanks Bagus!)

Posted by Ethan at 11:31 AM
December 17, 2003

It's frickin huge out there!! and perfect!! but.. HUGE!!! I was actually trying to surf so i didn't sit and watch OB for too long.. but.. i saw flawless DOH+ titans A-framing and peeling and fucking destroying anything in their path. Massive. The offshores were raging too.. so these soaring wispy tendrils of spray were whipping off the tops of the behemoth olas. Geez.. nobody out when i cruised by at 6:43. I was hoping for some respite down in P-town.. Pulled into Smoke-a-Jay. The North end thundered with cavernous, double-over-head monster closeouts. The South end flirted with working.. One guy was suiting up. But.. it was still pretty gnarly.. with maybe half the waves closing out the whole beach. Lindy - not even close. the sea surface looked fantastic but the bland, flat sandbars couldn't handle the thick swell. Soo.. i continued driving south.. thinking maybe the Jetty.. I watched a ridiculously perfect looking mega-wave peel off at GWC.. the right at the north end. Man.. if you're adventurous and a seasoned surfer and like your surf conditions treacherous but glorious.. someone like Joel Fitzgerald or Koby Abberton... you would love GWC this morning.. Montara very scary. yikes.. then the Jetty.. about 10 groms out there.. Lerm, Steve and i watched for about 20 minutes as a grand total of 3 rideable waves came through.. it just wasn't working. Maybe as the tide goes out later on?? Santa Cruz is going to be going absolutely ballistic later today with the lower tide.. Jesus.. it'll be on turbo-fire!

again.. if you're Jonny Jobless or Wilber work-at-home or Larry long-lunch.. go check it out!!


oh yeah.. bagel has an art show tonight at the Makeout room from, like 8pm till 2?? bagel?? I got a sneak preview of some of his new stuff and its a bit saucy! If you like comical, erotic, mischievous sensuality you might want to check it out.. I think that Jake and i are going to try to hit it. Soo... you could also get some Indo stories from our man Jocular Jake..

also check out the mav's cam



Posted by Ethan at 10:27 AM
December 16, 2003

Yup.. we finally got some fun-lovin' conditions at the beach. Lerm and i paddled out pre pre dawn and found some loovely peaks. We struggled through about 30 frigid duckdives to get out there but then were blessed with some roping, freight-train sections. Chilly winds blew strait offshore from 90 degrees, sending prismatic plumes scurrying off the tops of pitching lips. I watched some SERIOUS fucking barrels this morning!!! Jesus! I mean.. just gaping, wide-open monster barrels that actually looked makeable if you were in the right place at the right time and adequately sacked up on the drop. I almost muscled my way into one on this ledging right but, just as i started to hum with the radiant glory of the barrel experience i found myself getting churned, spun and molested by the crashing wave.. d'oh! But.. i redeemed myself on a few thick, solid groundswell walls.. on this one right i took off pretty far behind the peak.. i had been observing how waves broke at this one spot and i thought i could kind-of backdoor the section.. and.. sure enough.. i just fucking barely held on to the drop.. but then pulled back up into the wall and jettisoned along at a rapid clip.. almost getting barrelled but not slowing down enough.. then flying into a full-speed cutty when the wave slowed down a bit.. and then milking the reforming wave way into the inside.. felt really good!! but then i was, as usual, severely punished by OB for my good ride as i took about 5 thick, pitching waves right on the nogged.. there is still a ton of sand in my hair right now from that..

soo.. yeah.. it's good.. i have a meeting now.. otherwise i'd relate some more antics that transpired.. there were about 50 dudes collected between two blocks.. otherwise the beach was pretty empty... though i didn't check sloat..

have fun!!


ps.. SURF!

another sick Jersey pic from the recent nor'easter

Posted by Ethan at 10:02 AM
December 15, 2003
lumpy and bumpy but cleaning up

Yesterday was a weird wind day. I guess a front passed over us or something because in the morning the wind blew *hella* strong out of the south.. at around 18mph.. you probably felt your house shake a bit on saturday night.. then by sunday mid-day the wind was blowing strait out of the west.. then, gradually, through the afternoon, the wind shifted around to the NW.. and then by nightfall last night it was coming directly out of the north.. Soo.. this morning the winds are blowing out of the ENE.. but not that strong. The swell, (7ft 13sec at the SF buoy) is large and lumpy.. but rapidly cleaning up and getting more surfable. The Papa buoy is back up to 22ft 13seconds.. soo.. our window of relative OB mellowness might be confined to this afternoon and tomorrow morning. Pretty much higher tides throughout the day. With this NE wind and solid swell you just KNOW that most north-county santa Cruz spots are on super-fire RIGHT NOW!! soo.. again.. if you're Jonny work-at-home or Nigel No-job.. get your arse down there right now.

I spent the day on saturday driving the coast and hunting out attractive lineups. I surfed a big, shifty, sub-par right reef 11 miles north of town with only 3 others for about two hours in the morning. I passed on a better wave about 13 miles north of town because of the 20 dudes clogging the idyllic situation. But.. my sesh ended up being really enjoyable. Big overhead+ set-waves would lurch in, rise up and powerfully break.. before mushing or ending on the shoulder. I caught about 15 rides.. mostly big drops followed by a cutback into the meat of the wave. Two older blokes were the only ones out there with me the majority of the time and they were super smily and really enjoying the big-wavy situation. One of them had a big, bightly-colored gun and would hoot loudly for himself while dropping into each of his waves. He was cool. After the sesh i hit up Cafe Brazil for an Acai bowl.. then watched the inconsistent, non-crowded?? action at the Lane for 30 minutes while i waiting from a call-back from Ward Coffee about whether the Brown turd was ready... next weekend.. then i drove back up the coast looking for a second sesh.. 4-miles up, in a little cove.. not too crowded.. but disheveled, shifty and seemingly tough to lock into a smooth one.. the S winds were causing mild destuction. Got back in my car.. drove about 500 yards.. then pulled over to watch an immaculate, perfect-looking right peel and feather at a spot i've never seen surfers out. Nobody out this time either.. and i'm not sure if/how you could get out there.. but.. a beautiful, virgin?? (doubtful) wave breaking about 5 or 6 miles north. Then at 11 miles, the left was working purdy good.. but again inconsistent.. One shredder taking names on the infrequent walls.. airs and giant gaffs.. then at 13 miles about 25 guys out at the muscular, churning, absolutely working right-hander. Watched one guy destroy the lip about 8 times on one ride.. Just bottom turn, then BLAM! then bottom turn.. then BLAM.. etc.. impressive.. but.. i wasn't up for jostling and battling and growling for waves.. soo.. kept going.. south winds not friendly at Waddell.. made up all the way back up to Lindy.. where the surface was smoothed out and the lips feathering and holding from the strong offshore wind. Most waves closed out but many did not! Tons of waves threading in.. zero vibes.. i was out there.. caught about 20 little rides.. fun!

soo.. this afternoon and tomorrow morning.. get on it..


Jersey (lbi) pics from LBIsurfer (pics from day after "big wednsday") -- pics posted here on E's on Friday

Posted by Ethan at 11:57 AM
December 12, 2003
big.. glory day

SF buoy up around 9ft 20sec. Got a call from Christian that woke my arse up around 7:15. He said it looked big and good. Hrmm.. I had already bailed on the morning thanks to some late night revelry... Sometimes ya just gotta party a bit and maybe miss a morning!! or something.. Anyway.. then Robme called me 20 minutes later. He was watching Christian paddle out through the 8 rows of whitewater at Sloat. The Bro-zillian supposedly squeaked out with relative ease... compared to some others who were reportedly getting thumped and pulverized by the incoming bombs. Then Robme tells me of Christian taking off on a huge, double-overhead beast.. taking a elongated, super-steep, extendo drop to the bottom.. then back up to the top for a nice turn.. whence the wave sucked out and got all heinously hollow again.. and Christian nearly air-dropped off his top turn.. back down.. back up and top turned again.. Robme said it was quite impressive!! Go Christian!!
Sooo.. it looks big.. but with lulls to make it doable. I received an email from OceanBeachAlerts stating that OB was again below acceptable levels of bacteria.. soo.. that's good.. or.. bad.. depending on whether or not you skipped today's session because of assumed health risks.. I'll wager that much of the coast will light up somethin' fierce today! There is very little wind and the swell looks powerful and serious. Man.. I don't usually like to admit it.. but i reallly was tempted to call in sick and head down the coast.. but.. another day.

soo.. good luck out there.. not sure what the best spot will be? Maybe in town as the tide drops or even some Marin spots if the wind stays light or easterly? But if i wasn't working i know where i'd be headed today.. SOUTH!

Soo.. Kaiser and Marco are in Baja scoring huge! and Jake is in Indo getting the sweetness.. and Christian is dropping bombs at home. And Bagel is currently mid-flight to Hawaii and other peeps are contemplating the Mentawais and Kus and Hennessey in Jersey are enjoying some jersey juice today.. check these pics..

Jersey juice (pics from

also.. it looks like the pipe masters will start today in about an hour (10:30 pacific time)

Posted by Ethan at 09:47 AM
December 11, 2003
large, burly and unsurfable.

Big, bulbous, out-of-control waves this morning. Definitely smaller than yesterday morning but still wild and untamed. Torrential downpours last night have overflowed some storm drains and caused some flash-flooding. I'd wager the water is pretty dirty right now as last night marked the first official heavy rain of the year. Anything that hadn't already loosened from its land-based moorings by the sporatic rain of weeks past now has.

the pipe masters is on standby this morning. The first day will be for the trials.

work beckons.. good luck with surf today??

photos from Sarge

Posted by Ethan at 10:29 AM
December 10, 2003
Huge and out of control

White caps far out to sea this morning.
Absolute, utter anarchy out there.
Even if you could paddle past the 15? rows of thick white-water there wouldn't be much in the way of shapely waves for you to ride on the outside. I didn't see any evidence of waves out at the potato patch but a few outer outer outer OB sandbars were showing signs. The SF buoy is currently at 16.4ft 16seconds! Bay area winds are currently out of the WSW... soo.. i'm not sure if Santa Cruz will be working? It probably will be in the extremely tucked away spots like Sharks cove and Cowells later on with the lower tide? It might be worth a drive down there just to check the coast and see how all the spots deal with this extremely raw energy. huh.. soo.. according to blakestah we might see rideable surf around here on friday.. before the next system hits on saturday.. hopefully that will come to fruition as mine arse is jonesing for a few slanky waves!!!

I also want to mention that this weekend i saw a surf spot in SF that i've never seen before.. A point break with only two surfers out there. Supposedly it's called **zz*'*. i guess it only breaks once or twice a year.. Very interesting.. Email me if you want confirmation of your guess or if you think i'm a nimwit for even mentioning it.

ahh yes.. i almost forgot.. further happenings in regard to the Valley Beyond Time. On monday i witnessed that cavalcade of black lincoln town-cars cruise down JFK boulevard. In the backseat of the rear-most car the tinted window lowered just enough for me to catch a glimpse of what looked like me staring back at me. After seeing the Necro-esque Panda up in the Eucalyptus tree two minutes earlier i grew concerned that somehow the beings of the Valley Beyond Time had used my sperm to create a doppelganger of myself, or maybe a legion of doppelgangers? I slept uneasily Monday night and then again last night. My sleep was filled with vivid, shocking, distressing dreams. I dreamt that a small army of my doppelgangers slowly, silently disseminated over the earth and assimilated into various cities, villages and countrysides. I watched in my dreams as each of these doppelgangers engaged various folk in conversation. I was vaguely aware that something within the exhaled breath of my copies was inhaled by the people of the world during these conversations. Some subtle, technologically-advanced virus or something.. I couldn't pin it down in my dreams, but i sensed a vague dread welling up in me and a foreshadowing of ill tidings. Just before i woke up this morning a huge sunflower took over my entire mind's eye. I sensed an overwhelming calming force emanate from this sunflower. In my dream i tittered and swooned with a warm, comforting emotion. Then the sunflower emitted a pungent essence into my dreamscape. I smelled this essence and it filled me with a vision. I saw that it was possible to counteract the viral attack of my doppelganger army. I sensed that with some small action on my part i could help bring balance and peace to the ill-will toward modern humanity harbored by the beings in the Valley Beyond Time. I began to see what i could do to catalyze this counter-action but my dream grew hazy.. then suddenly i was awake.

The clock read 6:25am. I decided to walk down to the beach and mull over this powerful and in some ways realer-than-reality dream. As i ascended the dunes the sound of the ocean overwhelmed my senses. Raw, mighty, angry, violent, beautiful. I could barely see past the initial lines of breakers but i could hear and sense the epic wildness... I looked back over my left shoulder and saw that the sun began to rise in the southeast. Within minutes a kaleidoscope of oranges, reds and yellows filled the eastern corner of the sky. This vibrant tapestry of celestial grandeur overwhelmed me with the grandiosity and artistic brilliance of nature. As i watched, the sea continued to boom and thunder.. a dark, treacherous, cackling beast of untamed energy behind me. But the soft, willowy, flourescent hues of the dawning sky instilled me with the same warmth and comfort of the sunflower in my dreams. Suddenly the patterns and shapes of the sunrise began to take on a ridiculous, impossiple, stunningly beautiful geometric lattice. It began to appear as if the clouds and colors in the sky where the underbelly of a gigantic, woven, multicolored blanket. As i watched, the pattern became more and more defined. Each little woven piece had a different hue and the whole vista nearly crushed me with its immaculate worth and drama..

Then.. just as my perception became absolutely transfixed.. the whole sky seemed to break apart.. the interwoven blanket pulsed and then exploded. Filling the sky with what seemed like millions of simultaneous firework explosions.. then it seemed that small ribbons of color flickered and began descending down to earth. The sunrise was still beautiful but now it had returned to just a normal level of exquisite natural beauty, with the exception of these millions upon millions of colorful ribbon-like things that fluttered, swept and floated down toward me. Soon enough they were landing on the sand all around. One landed on my shoulder and i picked it up and examined what seemed to be a piece of a fruit-roll-up or some such thing. It was sticky and orange and smelled like sweet nectar. I sniffed it cautiously but then, without barely thinking about it.. popped it in my mouth and began eating. instantly i left my earth-bound consciousness and entered a new realm. I was floating out in space, suspended in some liquid medium looking down on the spiralling milky way. Some type of energetic essence floated next to me, but i couldn't quite decipher its shape or manner. I attempted to fix my gaze on this essence and saw what seemed like an ever-morphing avatar of all the living things i knew.. the essence smoothly yet rapidly shifted from penquin to palm tree to grey whale to coyote to gnat.. while always maintaing a relaxed demeaner and fixed look my way. It then spoke to me, "We meet again Ethan, in case you can't tell, I am Emporer Necro. It seems that you have been visited by my sister Ophelia, who often takes the shape of a sunflower. Let's just say that her and i don't always see eye to eye about the path of the earth. But... nevertheless, because of her apparent interest in you and your part in the plan, things have grown slightly more complicated. You see Ethan, you are now faced with a choice. A choice that may affect the future of all human beings on earth. Choose carefully and wisely."

(to be continued)

kagingba's photo

Posted by Ethan at 10:27 AM
December 09, 2003
a pocket of sweetness before the darkness

Yup.. Lerm and i hit the local beach before the sun began to rise. We were pleasantly surprised at 6:35 as we gazed out over head-high, feathering, chiseled, seductive lines. Biggest waves not much more than head-high. Paddle-out not looking ludicrous. Fuck yeah!! We ran down.. did a quick stretch and paddled out. After some shore-dumpy beatings we were out there. Clean, offshore-groomed ocean surface. 5 or 6 wave sets rolling in every 5 minutes or so.. with smaller in-between waves here and there. It often proved tough to be in the perfect spot.. but sections, drops and even barrels were on offer for the crafty-of-mind and fortunate-of-position. I caught one ledgy left where i remembered not to pig-dog.. made the steep drop.. then crouched down and turned hard off the bottom.. then hard again off the top. Felt good. On another wave i lept to my feet and projected immediately ahead of a crashing section.. then pumped like a maniac for 10 or 20 yards along a walled, quickening slab. fun!! we ended up getting sucked north at a brisk clip..

It seemed that conditions gradually deteriorated while we were out there. But.. it's still highly surfable and might be the last beach day for a while.. maybe even the last surf day! gasp!! The papa buoy is looking hella supah gnar! A few hours ago it was at 37ft 16seconds!! fark!! It looks like it's going to hit hard sometime late tonight or tomorrow morning.. It would be crazy if OB looked all mellow again tomorrow morning.. and many of us were out there having fun.. when all of a sudden these ominous, evil black blips filled the horizon like some kind of approaching army of death's minions.. Then suddenly surround us with giant double/triple-overhead monsters.. I've been out there before when the swell just suddenly lurches up.. it's crazy!! and exhilerating..

we'll see..

pipeline contest postponed.. this is what it looked like this morning..

Posted by Ethan at 10:21 AM
December 08, 2003
tough love...

I did the complete drive this morning.. and.. got fricken SKUNKED!

OB - large, raunchy, harrowing and crazy... nobody out. I watched some beautiful, ludicrous peaks throw and barrel and churn at Sloat. Big foam-ball barrels and shit.

Rockaway - Large, poorly-shaped close-out walls.. The left at the far south end may have been working if you like that little rocky spot.

Lindy - doable.. smaller (shoulder-high semi-peelers, head-high closeouts)... nobody out. ugly but not as ugly as Lindy gets. Don't know why nobody was out??

GWC - Saw some high-performace sections coupled with high-intensity-poundings. doable for the super-surfer.

Montara - Likewise watched some incredible, glorious sections peels and barrel.. All glassy from the light offshore-wind. but.. You'd be taking some gruesome closeout death-hammers on the head to get in position for that 1 in 10 money wave.

Jetty - the tide was too high. Otherwise it might have been perfect.. There was significant swell cruising in.. but.. waves were breaking too far inside.. basically right on the rocks on the inside. Maybe when the tide goes out later it will turn on?? Many spots might turn on this afternoon.. all you work-at-homers keep an eye out and enjoy your freedom!!

soo.. i rode my bike to work and did the market street frogger game for a little excitement. yeah..

Soo.. when last i mentioned Tuesday's miraculous experience in the Vally that Time Forgot i had surfed that amazing left point-break.. then spoken with Emperor Necro in the form of that bubble-speaking orange brain coral. Then i met and copulated with that dark-skinned, green-eyed gorgeous vixen who turned out to be nothing but an amalgamation of millions of multi-colored insects.. some of whom, upon leaving the female manifestation, formed a container around my ejaculated sperm.. Others of whom reformed into the shape of a Koala.. which turned out to be Necro again.. who thanked me for contributing my genetic code.... SOOOO... I was obviously flabbergasted at this point but i knew i was dealing with forces well beyond my comprehension or control so i watched my tongue, and also my thoughts..

Necro the koala bear continued to telepathically speak to me. He said, "Ethan, I apologize for the carnal ruse.. but we hoped you would enjoy that method and reasoned it our best hope of collecting your dna without inconvenience or pain. You have served us kindly and we will now take you back to your home." Before i could utter a response or question what the fuck they planned to do with my sperm i noticed that huge stingray heading toward me from the deep sea. In a few moments it was hovering over me and had again gulped me up into its slimy, cavernous mouth. I remember again the feeling of rapid acceleration as i headed back out over the ocean. I remember again being calmed by it's gentle telepathic hum. Then it dumped me on the beach at Sloat. To my great surprise only 5 real minutes had elapsed during that whole journey. My surfboard was still sitting there on the beach where i'd left it and my car was parked above.. i went home.. then to work.. then wrote to y'all about the crazy, wacked-out happening.

Well.. i had nearly forgotten about that whole adventure until this morning.. As i rode my bike through the park i thought i noticed a koala bear hanging high above in one of the huge eucalyptus trees.. i skidded my bike to a stop and creened my neck in an attempt to see it but couldn't find it. huh? weird!! soo.. i kept riding and the next thing i know i see this cavalcade of black lincoln town-cars with tinted windows cruise down JFK boulevard. As the last car passed by the window cracked open a bit and i thought i noticed what looked exactly like me in the back seat! This doppalganger was looking strait at me.. I received an instant, primal telepathic message in my head, "Beware! Change is afoot." I was flummoxed and petrified and deeply deeply worried. Soo.. if you see what you think is me around today.. be afraid.. be VERY AFRAID!! bwahahahahh!!

(continued tomorrow)

Jake Patto won the sunset contest.. Andy got second.. soo.. i think that Slates is BARELY in the lead going into the pipe masters which starts today.. hot damn!!

Posted by Ethan at 09:54 AM
December 05, 2003
waves to be had

Pouring rain this morning woke me up around 6:20. I anticipated runoff funkitude but had visions of glassy, rain-pelted, head-high peelers wafting through my head. I painfully sloshed into my soaking-wet, freezing-cold, rain-fresh wetsuit and jogged down to the beach. I figured it might be a little on the large side.. but.. to my dismay it was absolutely unsurfable. Row upon row of whitewater and foam stretched way out to the cloudbreak sandbars. Headhigh++ waves broke haphazardly on the outside, with little in the way of surfable symmetry. Dejected.. i turned around and contemplated alterternatives.. A P-town check would make me late for work.. and would also put me in danger of coming in contact with Pacifca's now legendary runoff toxic sludge. But.. I drove down there in my wetsuit.. expecting rumpled conditions with giant sucking closeouts.. To my great surprise i knew immediately upon driving over that last hill past Rockaway that it was "on." The South winds groomed the surface perfectly, giving it that scalloped, smoothed offshore veneer. Flatness pervaded unless distinct waves cruised in. in other words a very easy paddle out. 3 or 4 distinct peaks worked some magic. i opted for the one furthest north and enjoyed 9 or 10 jones-assuaging rides before calling it a sesh. Waves would rise up and break steeply at first.. then offer a somewhat-mushy wall for 40 or 50 yards. The peak i surfed got somewhat overcrowded by the end of my session.. Maybe 15 people jostling for position.. it kind-of took-away from the pleasure a bit.. but. that's Lindy sometimes.. I just didn't expect it on a rainy friday morning at 8:30.

anyway.. The story of the Valley Beyond Time will continue on Monday..

a couple Alby Falzon photos

greg noll


john callahan photos

Posted by Ethan at 10:41 AM
December 04, 2003
a tad larger.. clean.. good!

Woke up to a dark, brooding, mischievous morning. Lerm called at 6:20, a bit exasperated that 50 surf vehicles had pulled into the Sloat lot in the last 4 minutes. We convened at a more low-key spot somewhere in the middle and paddled out. The SF buoy is up a bit from yesterday and conditions reflected it. We struggled through about 4 or 5 rows of frigid whitewater before reaching the lineup.. Waves broke on the outer bar consistently and forcefully. You couldn't really tell from the beach but once out there the peaks rolled in beautifully. The biggest waves a notch over head-high. Lots of peeling sections with makeable micro-barrels on the takeoff. Most waves would peter out after breaking on the outer bar but occasionally you could find a bowl that would lurch and then peel steeply for a while, hooking you with a long, substantial face. I enjoyed one long moment in the green room.. though I wasn't standing on my board.. i took off on a somewhat fierce left.. pig-dogged for an instant and tried to hold on as the lip pitched and threw over-top of me.. then the bottom really dropped out and i had no choice but to leap off my board.. as i soared through the air.. i gazed around in awe at the cylindrical liquid chamber surrounding me!! Yeeeahh!!! then BLLLAAAMMM!! as i got obliterated.. fun though! Yeah.. soo.. there were loads of high-quality, down-the-line rides on offer out there.. with but a few souls speckled about.. It's a good, solid day to get wet.. before the craziness begins.. this afternoon?? The outer buoys are starting to show signs.. California is at 16ft 10.. Papa is at 21ft 11sec. According to Blakestah Saturday will be the macker.. look out.. know your limits.

Soo.. yesterday i continued telling y'all about my strange experiences on Tuesday morning. If you'll remember.. a giant stingray swallowed me in its mouth and took me to some mysterious, enchanted place called the Valley Beyond Time. I communicated telepathically with a pod of giant dolphins who told me that Emperor Necro would speak to me shortly and that i should, in the mean time, enjoy myself surfing the stellar point-break.

Well.. after enjoying an extendo, magical, unreal session at the reeling reefy point that wrapped around the bay.. i began to paddle back toward the beach. The reef shimmered and sparkled with a plethera of vibrant, luminescent hues. Hundreds of striped, fluorescent fish scattered and swam all over the place. I began to stare into this huge patch of brain coral. Something about its cerebral-like pattern held my attention. As i looked deeper and deeper into it's convaluted undulations i began to discern some subtle movement. I refocused my eyes and sure enough watched as the orange brain coral morphed and re-coalesced itself into the form of a face. The face of the brain coral smiled at me! Then winked! Then began speaking.. I saw the lips move but couldn't hear anything until bubbles broke on the surface of the water, and with each bubble a new word let loose into my sonic reach. "Hello... my... friend. Welcome. My name is Necro. We have been anticipating your arrival for longer than you know. For eons we here in the Valley Beyond Time have enjoyed a peaceful, harmonious, unbroken existence since the dawning of the universe itself. The boundless mysteries of nature, thought and creation have stimulated our spirits and engaged our abilities for as long as we can remember. However, one aspect of our world that continually baffles us is the hubris of mankind. Over the last 2 centuries we've been receiving an increasing amount of distressing messages from our oceanic brothers and sisters throughout the earth. We know that you can't answer for the actions of your species, that's not why we brought you hear. You see.. We need to really get inside the human psyche in order to help rectify the harm meted out by the human hand." Tentatively.. i said, "uuhh.. ok." "Thank you, " returned Necro. "We will be communicating with you shortly.. Continue to enjoy the island and all its bountiful treasure.

Soo.. i continued paddling in toward the island. A bit perplexed, baffled and concerned about the conversation that had just transpired. I reached the beach and began to walk up toward the shack. I noticed a plate of fresh fruit and bread on the table.. Huh! cool... i guess... i started eating.. then laid down on a makeshift hammock built of grasses and reeds that hung between two palms.. After dozing off for a spell i awoke and stood up.. i looked down the beach and saw what looked like another human walking up toward me! GUH!!! i looked closer and saw that this human was in fact a voluptuous, dark-skinned, radiant bikini-clad vixen sauntering directly toward me! In a few moments she reached to where i stood and stood directly in front of me. Looking strait into my eyes with her own exotic green eyes. Her hair was dark and thick, pulled back behind her. Her whole body was wet from a recent swim.. She was incredible.. i mean.. just absolutely knock-down gorgeous and sexy and mysterious and... and... something else about her was maybe slighly askew?.. huh.. i wasn't sure.. but.. before i could process that last critical thought.. she reached out for me. grabbed me behind my neck.. pulled me close.. and began kissing me passionately on the mouth. She pulled my body close and i instinctively began caressing her own immaculate skin and body. Soon we were back near the shack.. lying on a few soft, woven, mats made of some natural fiber, in a little clearing near a stream.. We continued to kiss and soon were naked.. She pulled me on top of her and began to wrythe and groan.. She was amazing.. ravishingly beautiful... but.. there was still something.. something fidgety or slightly tweaked about her countenance.. like when you're watching a dvd and you notice a slight pixilation in the picture.. Anyway.. we were now officially, "knocking boots".. it felt great.. wild.. reckless.. triumphant. We both seemed to approach climax at the same time.. Then exploded together. Instantaneously this dark, luscious, divine sexy goddess of a women dissolved into a million, multi-colored, individual little insects.. The insects scattered and ran in all directions all around me but i noticed that many of them formed what looked like a little container near where the woman's groin had been! Other of the millions of insects reformed into the exact replica of a soft, fuzzy koala bear. The koala bear looked at me and again i heard a telepathic voice in my head. "Hello Ethan, This is Necro. Thank you for that sample of your genetic code."

(to be continued)

pics from the sunset ASP contest

Posted by Ethan at 10:19 AM
December 03, 2003
small.. super fun.. clean!

Man.. I know all you hard-core, burly OB stalwarts will laugh and snicker at what i'm about to say, but, "this morning was fucking rad!!" Shoulder-high, uber-glassy peaks rising and breaking all along the beach. Extremely minimal duck-diving. Technical, zippy, high-performance, quarter-pipe rides. Mini-barrels. PLATE GLASS! no wind. Small, mellow mid-week dawn-patrol crowd. I have to admit these were some of my favorite conditions! Kind-of a like a good day at T-street without the crowds.

nice to see Steve out there stylin' into a few on his longboard. Also a pleasure to watch the legendary Matt "sky" walker slank into a handful of nuggies. Right on gentlemen! keep it up!

soo.. it looks as if, "Something Wicked This Way Comes!" Rumors of, "it's gonna be 30 foot faces at Mavs on Saturday" are floating around the lineup. I can hear the scrubbing sounds of OB chargers re-waxing their 8'6" rhino-chasers for some rain-making sessions at Taraval. Man.. I could deal with a few more mellow days like today.. glassy, small and perfect.. but.. bring the abundance and we'll just have to sort it out.

soo.. yesterday i was describing my mystical encounter with the giant stingray.. It had just slurped me up into it's mouth and commenced flying back out over the ocean. A gelatinous slime encapsulated me inside the mouth and the briny sea-smell nearly knocked me out. But the stingray continued to communicate telepathically with me. It's voice soothed and assuaged my fear. It hummed a melodic story about an ancient, undersea world where immortal sea-beings lived in balanced harmony. I was asleep soon after. I woke up on a sandy beach. Palm trees wafted and chalky, white coral sand squeaked beneath me. I squinted out toward the ocean in the midday glare. Turquoise water as far as i could see. I looked back toward a richly tropical, mountainous island environ. A lush green canopy with huge colorful birds alighting the sky. I turned my head to the left and immidiately watched an immaculate, roping point-break left bend and peel down the far side of the bay within which i sat. WOW!! WHAT?? I turned my head back to the right, scanning, and just coming to my senses.. I noticed a pod of larger-than-normal porpoises bobbing just outside the lapping waves. One seemed to notice my movement and i immediately hear a different, softer, telepathic voice in my head. "Welcome to The Valley Beyond Time. We have been waiting for you and value your presence greatly. Thank you!" Please enjoy this island while Emperor Necro prepares for your consultation." I looked back toward the island and noticed a shortboard and a longboard leaning up against a little shack under some palms. SIIICK! I said, "Thank you. This seems a very enlightened place and i will gladly provide any assistance you may require of me." Next thing i know i'm paddling out to to head-high, 150-yard-long, peeling, barreling point-break perfection. Wondering what i'm doing here. who are these beings. What the fuck is going on??

(to be continued)

Posted by Ethan at 10:54 AM
December 02, 2003

I uncharacteristically slept through my alarm this morning. I think the soothing sound of the rain lulled me back to sleep.. but.. I cruised down to Sloat around 7:15, hoping to jump in the water for a few quick ones. 3 guys floated in the lumpy, lackluster lineup. I saw one mushy ride in about 10 minutes. The sun poked out from behind the clouds. The lack of wind created a gentle, easy feel to the air. But... regardless of atmospheric pleasantries.. the waves were pretty crappy. I passed. Someone in the parking lot told me that Lindy was working..?? dunno.. If you've nothing on your plate I'd suggest a leisurely paddle-out. The surface looked inviting and there were a few sections here and there... mush-burgers on the outside and dumpy closeouts on the inside..
Just before i turned to get back in my car i noticed a glimmering blip on the horizon. Huh. At first i thought it was the Farallons.. but gradually it seemed to approach the beach, getting closer and closer. I did a double-take just to make sure there wasn't something in my eye.. but sure enough what looked like a giant stingray flew just above the water surface, sending a plume of spray high in the air as it sped toward shore.. Fuuuuck!! the thing was huge and it was headed right toward me!! Other people on the beach started screaming and running the other way.. but something held me transfixed and hinted deep within that the stingray held some message or meaning for me... Now i could see the true size of this beast.. about 30ft by 20 feet.. it was still moving at what seemed about 100mph directly toward me.. Just before colliding head-first into the beach at Sloat.. the thing abruptly stopped.. The wind and water nearly knocked me down as the inertia of the beast's movement and breaking sent water, sand and air whipping toward land.. The stingray hovered just above the waves, shadowing the two surfers who were still frantically paddling out from underneath it. It's two sunken, prehistoric eyes blinked and looked directly into me. The next thing i knew i could hear and feel this thing communicating with me through some type of telepathy. My mind and body were quivering with attunement wrought from fear and astonishment. It said to me, "I BRING A MESSAGE FROM THE DEEP! EMPEROR NECRO OF THE VALLEY FROM BEYOND TIME REQUESTS A REPRESENTATIVE FROM THE REALM OF MORTAL SOULS. YOUR ACCEPTANCE OF THIS REQUEST WILL BE REWARDED MOST LAVISHLY." The giant stingray then inched closer until it hovered directly overtop of me. I could reach up and stroke its soft white underbelly. It moved slowly until it's narrow, slit-like mouth was directly overhead.. I raised my arms up into this mouth and then felt as it sucked me up inside. It was warm and dark and i could feel the instant acceleration and movement of the stingray as it turned around and headed back out to sea.

(to be continued)

couple shots of OB on thanksgiving from

Posted by Ethan at 09:59 AM
December 01, 2003
Huge weekend! stormy today.

Wow.. once again Turkey day ushered in some fantastic waves to local Bay Area beaches. Thursday was large and well-shaped, offering double-overhead racetrack sections and grooming offshore winds. The swell grew throughout the day, culminating in a few garage size barrels near Taraval at around 5pm. I got on it in the morning and had a blast.. and got blasted a few times.. Nice to see Trout out there!

Then Friday! the day of days in my opinion. The swell diminished in size considerably.. but.. the conditions were absolutely flawless! Head-high sets funnelled in every 4 minutes or so. Extendo, ruler-edged, tapering lines splayed themselves out for us wave-riding enthusiasts to shralp. I rode Kaiser's 7'0" mini-gun for the 3-hour morning marathon sesh and might have actually caught close to 40 waves. It was more board than necessary but it allowed for mucho paddling speed and total ease in catching waves and negotiating the sometimes tricky offshore-whipped ledgy drops. Then Friday afternoon the swell continued its demise but the sun shone brilliantly between patchy cumulus clouds. The ocean looked like a perfectly taught swath of seran wrap.. i mean UTTER TOTAL COMPLETE GLASS! Near flat conditions except for the 5-minute-interval sets which peeled and cracked and peeled along multiple sandbars up and down the beach. A beautiful, peaceful time to be in the ocean or on the beach. One cutback sticks in my head. I shoulder-hopped this one lightly-barrelling set wave after it peaked a few yards outside of me. I spun and angled down the drop.. then accelerated briskly and pumped a few times.. then the wave kind-of bowled and bent inward and i had the presence of mind to hammer a turn into the inviting pocket.. For once i was totally balanced and somewhat successfully slashed a deep divot into the lip of the wave.. I remember putting all my might into the turn and feeling that energy outlay translate into displaced water and an immediate change in direction. Damn.. felt really good.

Saturday!! A new swell pumped in overnight. Lerm and i sat at the computer on friday night at pondered the 24ft 15second papa buoy reading.. Shiiiit.. no more mellow, perfect, gentle, easy OB! Anyway.. i skated down to check it saturday morning only to see Lerm getting out of the water, telling me it was super gnar! He drifted 10 blocks in 40 minutes and suffered through about 3000 duckdives to get out.. Sure enough i looked over the dunes and it was LARGE and pumping and throwing and crazy.. with about 8 rows of whitewater between the beach and the lineup.. Such a difference between friday afternoon and saturday morning. Lerm left his wetty on and we drove south in search of some more user-friendly conditions. We got about a mile down the coast, pulled into second-lot-sloat and watched, perplexed, as chunky, beautiful lines peeled along, only about 100 yards from the beach. only 1 row of whitewater with clean, pure, groping, barrelling sweetness marching in and peeling left like some macking SW swell or something. About 40 heads bobbed around the crowded Sloat lineup but only a few strewn to the south, with just as many rideable waves. We couldn't believe the difference in conditions between here at the middle of the beach. night and day. We paddled out and enjoyed a 2 hour sesh. Snagging bombs, getting ripped from our boards duckdiving powerhouse set waves on the way back out, etc. Nice to experience some serious, controlled, uncrowded, throaty, barrelling waves with offshore winds. Later in the day the swell continued to grow and by nightfall the hell-chargers were dropping atom-bombs from Rivera to Sloat. Some of the bigger waves maybe pushing triple overhead?? Some NASTY wipeouts too, as i think one too many weekend warrior somehow made it to the outside on his log.

Yesterday it was stormy and i didn't see anyone out.

Today more stormy conditions.. though a bit smaller than yesterday. surfable.

Blakestah predicts fun overhead surf until friday.. then more hugeness comes our way! lookout!!!

a few triple crown shots that many of you have probably already seen

Posted by Ethan at 10:14 AM