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Small but fun, peaky

A wee bit more juice out there this morning. Nothing spectacular, but a consistent flow of swell produced chest-high A-frames, dumpy closeouts and the occasional makeable barrel. Lerm and I surfed all by our lonesome somewhere out in the spooky, foggy, gigantic expanse of empty beach. A few sea-lions swam over to hang out with us, and formations of Pelicans swooped overhead. Most of the waves were small, piddly mushy things but occasionally a larger mound would line up on a sandbar and unload its collective mass in just the right way to produce a steep, shreddable wave-face. Lerm was owning the chest-high nuggies on his backhand. I caught a handful of fun ones too. I got up to the lip with some speed on a right toward the end of the session, which felt good. Good times. I love mid-week foggy dawn-patrols with nobody around. I forgot how much fun it is to just catch waves. Surfing!!

If you read the comments from yesterday afternoon you’ll see that the illustrious BVB is currently struggling through a bit of an ethical dilemma. Turns out that a friend of his, the wife of his friend ‘Bert,’ isn’t exactly happy in her marriage and has the hots for BVB. Check out BVB’s post,

“Ethical question seeing as how it's kinda slow here today and I have time to write and I need help with a most pressing issue.Ok, my wife and I were partying with our friends up at the R-River this weekend. It was way hot. We swam and drank margarita's - had a great lunch then I found myself alone on the deck with my friends wife and she blurts out, ' Are you happy?', her tanned breasts are hanging out of her small top and she can see I am trying not to react to them. No biggie, I say to myself - I can handle this: I say , ' Of course I'm happy - what do you mean!, why?'
'Well... I'm not', she say's and continues:
' - he's (let' s call him Bert) become so boring, sexually, and as a mate he's losing it - all he thinks and cares about is the mortgage and his ability to make the money to keep this house'... and she trials off with a heaving sigh. The entire time she's writhing like a sex starved snake in front of me - all raging nipples and flesh - I can see my wife down on the street below innocently playing with the dog and Bert is in the yard tinkering with his fucked up fence.
So today she sends me these naked photo's of herself. The four of us have been friends for over 10 years - WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?”


Joe sent me this cool pic from Indo (thanks Joe!)
nice view

Seth took this pic of a spot he calls Pickles

BVB you owe it to yourself and your friend to post the pictures here. If they were polaroids then you owe it to yourself and your friend to get down to Kinko's, scan them, and then post the pictures here.

Posted by: in BVB's best interests at August 11, 2004 10:15 AM

IT'S HUMP DAY!!!

Posted by: j at August 11, 2004 10:17 AM

Hey BVB YOU NO GOOD SOB!! DON'T DO IT! YOU'LL REGRET IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!!! Let me do it and I'll give you all the details.

Posted by: todular at August 11, 2004 10:30 AM

HUMP DAY, YAY!

Posted by: mwsf at August 11, 2004 10:31 AM

we definitely need to see the goods...

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 10:41 AM

Hump day ---
Hump Back on Jurujuba beach near Rio


see todays' truthout for the rest of the story

Posted by: snake at August 11, 2004 10:42 AM

Here's my advice, Bad Vibe:

Posted by: cadaver at August 11, 2004 10:47 AM

BVB is a pimp.

Pimp her like a pimp but don't cheat on your wife.

Checked the south lots on the way into the office. Looked doable but not super appealing. Maybe it is the fog, maybe it is my lack of motivation, but I couldn't get up to save my life this morning.

E/Lerm, glad to hear you got some.

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 10:48 AM

6:30 onshore breeze uncomfortable, better away from the Gate. 7:30 things cleaned up nicely. Swell way close interval, backs off at times. Ok day to surf, not great.

Posted by: Nate at August 11, 2004 10:48 AM

BVB,
Send us all the naked pics, so we can tell you if you should or shouldnt.

Honestly, this is a joke.
If it isnt a joke, then grow up.

-Jacques

Posted by: jacob at August 11, 2004 10:58 AM

POST THE PICS! only then can we make an informed decision.

Posted by: luke at August 11, 2004 10:58 AM

BVB is a pimple.

Pop her like a pimple .....

Pimp? Let me guess, Kaiser is a white boy? Right?

Posted by: todular at August 11, 2004 10:59 AM

BVB - don't do it. Be loyal to your wife and friend - you'll be much better off in the long run. Margaritas and common sense don't mix well.

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 11:01 AM


Posted by: 3to5setsof7 at August 11, 2004 11:01 AM

Todular, I am pink, black, asian, native american and purple all at the same time but I used to reside in the LBC.

Let me guess, your real name is Todd?

Yeah, fun!

Jesus.

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 11:07 AM

Oh wait, I just re-read that, you must be a dermatologist as well no?

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 11:09 AM

Yeah-some fun this morning. Mr. Blake. We have never met but a young blond haired lady surfer this am mentioned your name after talking to you. I was going to paddle over and say hi but you took off on a left and ended up about 75 yards away. I got out about 5 minutes after you. I was suiting up when you crossed the grassy hump. Any way, next time...

Strange current this am. Inside was pushing hard to the south. Then outside was pushing to the north but dropped dead at a rip leaving everybody in kind of a bunch. I paddled south a few times to get away but kept ending up back in the pack.

Posted by: Dennis at August 11, 2004 11:12 AM

Actually, my name really is todular. My dad's name is tubular and mom's name is modular. We used to reside in the KFC. WORD UP YO!!! REPRESENTIN!!!!

just ribbin ya Kaiser that's all. Have a nice day.

Posted by: todular at August 11, 2004 11:17 AM

Somebody did'nt have his cup of SANKA this morning.

Posted by: todular at August 11, 2004 11:23 AM

My services are available at a very cut rate. I have a good resume and read 'Men from Venus, Women from Mars' 7 times

Posted by: Orenthal at August 11, 2004 11:23 AM

SSUURRFFF!

Posted by: steama at August 11, 2004 11:24 AM

Millions in United States face mega-wave from island collapse

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 11:28 AM

OB: yup, surfable. Takeoff spots really picky. And Dennis, I hear you on the N/S simultaneous current! It splits along a certain street. Never boring, this beach.

Shoutout to Dennis, Blakestah, Klooless, and Loon on the DP today. You guys were ripping. What a blast. Loon got front row seats to 2 of my most stellar botched takeoffs in memory. Loon - it is always okay to laugh at my wipeouts. So proud to represent feminine grace and beauty...NOT! Befuddled why I was waaay off today - yet when it's been garbage I've run into a few down-the-lines....what the? Finally got a great straight-down drop on a wave just like the two I screwed up, by sitting in a place nobody wanted. A peak just showed up, all mine. Yay! Cheers all,

Posted by: s.s. sharkbait at August 11, 2004 11:29 AM

"Yeah-some fun this morning. Mr. Blake. "

It's Dr. Blake, sir. He's a smarty!

Posted by: courtesynate at August 11, 2004 11:31 AM

Four Inmates Flee Jail, Return With Beer

News Edition: 07/20/2004

ROGERSVILLE, Tennessee-- With their cell doors accidentally left unlocked, four county jail inmates escaped only to return the same night -- with beer.
The Hawkins County Jail inmates, who bought four cases of beer before returning to the jail, were charged Monday with escape and introduction of intoxicants into a penal institution, the Kingsport Times-News newspaper reported Tuesday.

"I guess they thought if they came back they wouldn't be charged with escape, but they were wrong," Sheriff Warren Rimer said.

Ridgy Dean Coleman, Jimmy Joe Stapleton, David Wayne Blizzard and David Allen Hopkins escaped Thursday night when their cell block doors were unlocked and a faulty control panel failed to alert jailers, Rimer said.

Two of the inmates walked out through a fire exit, left the door propped open with a small Bible and made a hole in the exercise yard fence. They walked to a nearby market and bought the beer.

The inmates did not raise alarm at the store because they were wearing street clothes borrowed from other prisoners. The crowded jail doesn't have enough orange jumpsuits for all of its inmates.

The sheriff pointed out that all 36 inmates on the cell block might have tried to escaped while the doors were unlocked.

"At least they came back," he said.

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 11:32 AM

Attn: Longboard skaters. I'm looking to get a legit longboard to carve. I'm an old, old skool skater. I'm leaning toward a Lib Tech Koi 44" anyone ride one? Any truck width recco's? I'm prolly gonna stick with my Sims snakes from way back when for now. But any wheel 411 is appreciated. btw. if you haven't got them, powell swiss bearings are awesome. thanks.

Posted by: 3to5setsof7 at August 11, 2004 11:34 AM

Is/was OB surfable today? My usual spot is death shorepound. The bottom goes from 20'-1' in 1'. Linda mar looked too kooky-blue crushy-transplantationous-yay yay-palm palmy, the rest down there looked ill.

Posted by: sammy_hagar_rawks at August 11, 2004 11:35 AM

A few quick rides among the funky surf offered up on a peaceable morning.

Item! When it takes you six seconds to execute a duck-dive, seven-second period surf can be a challenge.

Posted by: Klooless at August 11, 2004 11:37 AM

don't do it BVB! It sounds tempting...maybe it's a "set-up" to see if yer a loyal friend. Friends don't let friends do friend's wives. seen?

Posted by: as at August 11, 2004 11:42 AM

What the hell is this! I don't complain when you grump around the house all day with your mindless grunts and groans. I don't complain when you wake me up at 5am as you leave to go surfing. I don't complain about all your whining about "kooks" and "trannys" and "theinternetruinedeverythingaboutsanfranciscosurfno-culture" when you come home from a sunny day at kellys.

I didn't even complain when you dragged me up to that white-trash river "resort-town" to hang with your loser friends (good thing the dog was there to keep me company). But now you're considering screwing that trailer-trash!! Now I've gotta complain. NO SURF FOR YOU!!

Posted by: BVBs Wife at August 11, 2004 11:54 AM

it isn't didn't have the sanka...

it's: " i just switched to sanka. so have a heart."

-mr. vargas ridgemont biology instructor

Posted by: korewin at August 11, 2004 11:54 AM

funny, bvb's wife

Posted by: bagel at August 11, 2004 12:03 PM

OK. I think I know who Dennis is. But Klooless was there too???? ID please. Were you the one with the half-bleached hair? One of the two bald dudes? One of the hooded dudes?

And BVB, keep up the good work. Our ratings are going up up up.

Posted by: blakestah at August 11, 2004 12:05 PM

for all the underwater women's lacross fans out there

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 12:06 PM

boat-docks this morning

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 12:09 PM

Hooded, with clear-finish 6'6" Nev. I did some 360's and backside smacks, but all underwater.

Posted by: Klooless at August 11, 2004 12:22 PM

E, leave my girl off your site!

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 12:23 PM

does kinda look like your loovely lady.. sorry about that Kaiser Sose.

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 12:34 PM

whattup peeps! holy shit bvb - taking the blog into unkown territory. i already feel kinda dirty, but remain interested. my only input: that what happens on the blog is NOT likely to stay on the blog.

that was a fun niceness outing with blake- & bait-stah's this morning. little did i know dennis & klooless were there too. dennis, nice to see ya, i think we were on a peak together for a bit, saw you catch a nice right. rips were indeed pulling pretty good and there was a palpable WTV (wrong-tide-vibe), but we all managed to get into a few. ss is all-too-humble in her log as usual -- ms. bait made several late drops and was snug in the pocket on one, starting to lean into a bottom turn before the lip fell across her shoulder. just prior to that ss had glanced over toward me as a bigger outside wave started to peak and despite being a bit inside superbait just went for it, kaiser style. i was inspired.

RFS demo report (last in the series): conditions required called for quick drops today and the RFS readily handled them, holding tight on 3 drop-to-pigdog coverups. also did well with some zippy backside high line trimming, and a hard-banked frontside cutback off a wrapping left wall. i am sold. blakestah says that a new rainbow fin template suitable for the RFS will be available within a week or so, yee ha.

Posted by: loon at August 11, 2004 01:00 PM

Great pic! Keep 'em coming. I don't want to be the only bad influence.

BIK - Bad Influence Kaiser

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 01:03 PM

My board order.....

Posted by: Kaiser at August 11, 2004 01:05 PM

rell

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 01:09 PM

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 01:19 PM

and welcome back e! ob seems happy about your return.

how about all those seals out there this morning?

anyone have tips on how to distinguish seals from sea lions?

Posted by: loon at August 11, 2004 01:28 PM

BVB-
Just whack off to some porn and get over your friend's slutty wife.

There are some good free clips of me at bigmouthfulls.com also, i like the free samples at f*ckherthroat.com too. -Dont get caught by your boss.

Enjoy! Think of Me, but stay faithful to you wifey.

Love, and tongue,,,, Jenya J.

Posted by: Jenya Jameson at August 11, 2004 01:57 PM

sea lions have external ear flaps and seals do not. both are pinnipeds, though.

Posted by: as at August 11, 2004 01:58 PM

OB is firing right now. Not epic OB, but compared to the last 2 months it is worth a shot!!! get out there, one and all!!!
dave.

Posted by: parmenter at August 11, 2004 01:59 PM

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 02:00 PM

a spooky commercial

Posted by: lerm at August 11, 2004 02:00 PM

sea lions are bigger and have pointy noses. seals are smaller and have rounder faces. seals are generally frinedlier and much more playful in the water. sea lions are more like grouchy crusty locals. snorting and such as they move thru the line-up.

Posted by: 3to5setsof7 at August 11, 2004 02:00 PM

White-trash resort.. haha. Sounds like there were fun waves this morning. I'm with my girl as she's taking off to Italy on Friday for 4 months. Getting in quality time. I'm going for 10 days in Nov. 3to5: my friend and I are venturing into pressing our own longboards. Once we get a few nailed out, I can flow you one for cost. Same for anyone here. Anyway, enjoy the day. Blakestah, I'd like to try the RFS again, sounds like you've made some nice changes. I also ran into someone at Rockaway a few months ago riding a board with the RFS on it, he was trading boards with his buddy.

Posted by: Ian at August 11, 2004 02:04 PM

this looks kinda sick for how cheap it is...
http://www.dpreview.com/reviews/specs/Sony/sony_dscu60.asp

Posted by: bbr at August 11, 2004 02:16 PM

The main changes since the Fish Fest were
1) got a new range of rubber bumpers, so I can confidently set up a board within one bumper of optimal every time (and, BTW, longboards need it a LOT stiffer than shortboards)
2) Make about a dozen fins in the search for the right template, and settled in on the one I was on this morning, and Rainbow will be making fins with my template for future orders.
3) Settled in on what I think will be the best specs for a performance shortboard - loon will be on one, it combines the better features of the 6'8", 6'6", and 6'3".

I'm still doing some fin tests to get it even more fine tuned. The 6'3" (which is too heavy in the tail from two retrofits) can be loaned out if you are interested. It rides all right. Drop me a line.

Posted by: blakestah at August 11, 2004 02:23 PM

if a bitch wants to get fucked...i'm fucking her.

Posted by: understated stevie at August 11, 2004 02:27 PM

The gang was in town. I just picked up some water-proof name tags. You know, the ones that say "Hi my name is: " then you write your name on the tag. They will be left in a tin can on the pathway with an ink pen. I'm ready for a second seswsion now. Nice to off work today.

Posted by: Dennis at August 11, 2004 02:35 PM

bbr...that camera is sick. Sony gave all the pros one of those at some contest a while back. Kelly Slater takes it everywhere with him and snaps pics while surfing.

you are right, good price for a digi that is water proof.

Posted by: kookdom at August 11, 2004 02:55 PM

she was blabberin and yelling and gobbling like a turkey...

i knocked the boots from here to albuquerqe.

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 03:07 PM

Posted by: bbr at August 11, 2004 03:08 PM

BVB, your friend's wife sounds self-centered and shallow. Regardless of how she looks, that combo ain't sexy, it's ugly. And she's using "the horny" to be a divisive cheater. It ain't worth the poononny dude, whoever you are -- go tell your friend and show him the pix she sent you, do the right thing and totally humiliate her. I think your friend deserves to know that he should divorce his wife, it sounds like it's over. He doesn;t deserve to be talked about online by strangers as his wife makes overtures to you. She should be taken to the curb, at least taken down a notch.

And remember, even the hottest chicks take fetid, corn-and-peanut filled dumps. Remember that next time your scopin' out butt floss. We're all flawed. That's wisdom from the dome!! [ha ha]

-MONKEY MILK (in the lineup since 1983)

Posted by: Onanistic Bonobo at August 11, 2004 03:20 PM

monkey milk droppin' knowledge.

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 03:22 PM

i call bullshit on BVB and won't believe him unless pics get posted....

and monkey milk - HILARIOUS re: the takin a big fat dump 411. classic. i saw a bumpersticker once, something like "no matter how hot you think she is someone else is sick of her shit"...possibly literally

Posted by: j at August 11, 2004 03:38 PM

BVB: remember "bros before hoes"

Posted by: as at August 11, 2004 03:48 PM

how much time would we reaaaally be spending with them if they did not have vaginas...

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 03:55 PM

Q: what do you call the useless skin around the vagina?
A: the woman

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 04:00 PM

man smart but the woman smarter

Posted by: yellowman at August 11, 2004 04:06 PM

Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A. Shoot him again.

Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the nooose.

Q. What do you call the useless piece of skin on the end of a man's penis?
A. His body.

Q. Why do little boys whine?
A. Because they're practicing to be men.

Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him. OR
A. Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.

Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
A. Trustworthy.

Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Q. Why do doctors slap babies butts right after they're born?
A. To knock the penises off the smart ones.

Q. Why do men name their penises?
A. Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their decisions.

Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
A. Because not one will stop and ask directions.

Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A. To stop the snoring before it starts.

Q: What's the best way to kill a man?
A: Put a naked woman and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one.

Q: What do men and pantyhose have in common?
A: They either cling, run, or don't fit right in the crotch!

Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.

Q: What is the difference between men and women...
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving her money, furs, and diamonds.

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals".

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 04:06 PM

all right now boys.

someone sounds a little angry.

without the ladies who would you snuggle with? who would you make dinner for? who would inspire you to write emotional music and paint moody artwork? Who would engage you in introspective conversation about spirituality, humanity and the self? Who would you gaze at in mouth-agape splendor?

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 04:07 PM

Adam is chillin in the garden of eden. Everythings is niceness, but he's kinda lonely, so he tells God so.
God says, "I can make you a perfect companion, who will care for you and pleasure you in every way you can imagine."
Adam thinks this sounds pretty good, and asks God, "Well, how much will it cost me?"
God replies, "An arm and a leg."

"Thats pretty steep, God. What can i get for a rib?"

Posted by: luke at August 11, 2004 04:08 PM

BVB's dilemma seems to have struck a chord with a quite a few pubescent lurkers. Little dudes, hit the back button on your browser a few times and resume jacking off to the pics on the wicked weasel website. that's the closest you're going to come for a while.

Posted by: eric at August 11, 2004 04:11 PM

those are some funny "man" jokes!

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 04:15 PM

Q: What is the difference between men and women...
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

its funny cause its true

Posted by: bagel at August 11, 2004 04:17 PM

who would i practice slam dancing on

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 04:17 PM

I must say there has been some pretty farking dis-respect for the ladies here today. where is that coming from fellas? bitches and hoes...c'mon that ain't nice no matter what. it's 4:20 and my 10 month wedding anniversary. over and out

Posted by: 3to5setsof7 at August 11, 2004 04:23 PM

I feel like I am stranded on a desert island and it is firing out front but I have no board.

Translation: Wife has my truck cause her ride is in the shop, thus, no surfy surf for me tonight, and it looks kinda fun out there.

Maybe if I get my truck back and wait another month something may swell up.

Posted by: kookdom at August 11, 2004 04:34 PM

dont fuck with the skins if shes trying to act shitty.

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 04:43 PM

Posted by: e at August 11, 2004 05:00 PM

Posted by: bagel at August 11, 2004 05:11 PM

creepy

Posted by: bbr at August 11, 2004 05:21 PM

any chance for the after-work OB special? go i am so desperate for SURF!@

Posted by: luke at August 11, 2004 05:32 PM

you disrespecting me?

Posted by: j at August 11, 2004 05:42 PM

5:45 - Was glassy at 2 when I split - can't get the motion to go back out after a beer. If I were you I'd go NOW!
3ft. and fun.

Posted by: Town Crier at August 11, 2004 05:46 PM

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 05:58 PM

4 non blonds!

Posted by: bagel at August 11, 2004 06:26 PM

BVB - any way you look at it, you're fucked.

Posted by: caveman at August 11, 2004 06:50 PM


Philip Guston

Posted by: cadaver at August 11, 2004 07:06 PM

CAVEMAN!

Excellent!

Posted by: at August 11, 2004 08:49 PM

Well it looks like fall is approching. Sea lions, pelicans in great numbers.
The weather is getting warmer.
Are you ready?
Fall is near. Pray for surf.
Big A

Posted by: pixelpete at August 12, 2004 12:48 AM

BVB

karma man. Just ask yourself, is she worth half of everything I own? I think you know the answer. The real dilemma is do you clue in your buddy that he'd better get into therapy and start COMMUNICATING with his wife, or do you just stay on the side of that storm? ps for this advice, when I'm surfing ft point, I'll repeat my advice to you, and don't burn me on a wave.

Posted by: banjo at August 12, 2004 07:02 AM

Like the saying goes: "Love is grand, divorce is a hundred grand."

Posted by: Bruce at August 12, 2004 09:00 AM

Blutch

Posted by: bagel at August 12, 2004 10:11 AM

Bad Vibe, don't cross your sugar momma.

Posted by: BVB advisor at August 12, 2004 10:22 AM

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one`s husband, but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.

Posted by: penis enlargement at January 19, 2005 04:11 AM

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one`s husband, but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.

Posted by: penis enlargement at January 19, 2005 04:45 AM

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one`s husband, but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.

Posted by: penis enlargement at January 19, 2005 05:16 AM

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one`s husband, but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.

Posted by: penis enlargement at January 19, 2005 05:45 AM

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one`s husband, but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.

Posted by: penis enlargement at January 19, 2005 06:12 AM
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