Mogadishu
Life, art, music, sex, ice cream.
Early October massive hurricane paused east of Hatteras.
Camping along the crenellated Maine coastline.
On your friend's 35ft fishing boat.
Stopping in coves.
Sampling the thrice-a-year points and reefs.
Three days of wave-filled gluttony.
Fresh lobster and tuna.
Ruler-edged cobble-stone points.
Aurora Borealis glimmering in the night.
Long rides with nobody around.
Month-long vacation in Rio.
You're with your friend and his hot Brazilian girlfriend.
You've been schooling Portuguese for the last year.
She has tons of friends.
Cute, mysterious, luscious.
Olive skin.
Round derrieres.
Sexy dispositions.
A few of them hint toward flirtation during your first few weeks.
Later it's full-on Salsa dancing at a hot, sweaty club.
The girls are getting down with it.
Moving, shaking, gyrating, quivering.
Butt poppin'.
Damn.
One of them presses up and you start grinding on the dance floor.
Long eye-lashes. Full lips. Mad style.
She leans back and whispers in your ear.
Something about the sunrise and her apartment.
It's on like teflon.
You're an aid-working doctor in the horn of Africa.
Shit is gnarly in Somalia.
Civil war. Tribal murders. Kidnapping. Anarchy.
You've been air-lifted in and are helping malnourished tribal people in a small village outside Mogadishu.
Distended bellies. Rickets. AIDS. Fear.
The people are kind and gracious of your help.
They are proud and ashamed of their plight.
Their once-prosperous fishing village at the mouth of a small river shows signs of it's former beauty.
One of the villagers see's the wave on your t-shirt and wants to show you something but you've got 50 people waiting in line and you don't understand what he's saying.
The next day the same guy returns.
He's barefoot and bone-skinny but has the biggest shit-eating grin on his face.
Soo... at the end of the day you follow him along a trail past the end of the river and then around a corner of the coast.
He giggles and points out toward the sea and then points to your now sweaty and dirty t-shirt with the the Drew Brophy insano wave drawing.
This gnarly right-handing is gulping and peeling and spitting and going bananas right out there.
The offshores are grooming and the whole setup is just insane.
The next day you vow to bodysurf it but when you return the swell has dwindled to nothing.
Squan/Jenks
what, no slayer day post e? i was expecting some creative evilness this morning.
25 days and counting until i leave for 11 days in puerto (with the boys) then 12 days in costa rica (with the woman), gughghg....
Posted by: bbrshit.. forgot about Slayer day.
Dark, heavy, forboding menace!!!!
Posted by: eyo bbr that sounds very nice. have a great time
on both ends....
norf winds bwow!
-elmer fudd.
Posted by: korewinmore of saturday and sunday please!
I went to check the surf from the dunes and was surprised to see people towing into tiny waves. I guess you need to practice on something, I just did not think that was legal at OB.
Anyone else see that?
Posted by: toooshyThat was friday evening.
Posted by: toooshyYeah I've seen others out there practicing tow-in on deserted parts of our coast, who knows what the rules are?
I got this pretty sweet strapped board for kiting that I'm sure would be a blast towing on small waves, so if any lurker out there has a ski and wants to practice? anyone- I'll even pay for gas!
Weekend was fun!
Posted by: artifacthttp://www.honoluluadvertiser.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060606/NEWS01/606060342/1001/NEWS
Fine, fine. I'll take care of his girlfriend during his 10 month stay in lock-up.
Posted by: obroHey all-
SF/OB is not part of Monterey Bay sanctuary so, as far as I know, Coast Guard laws apply. I think this means skis can opeate out there but cannot come within 500' of other swimmers or surfers unless it's an emergency such as a rescue (boogers are speed bumps*).
I hate the buggers but always wished that someone would tow me to the lineup on big days. Image the bucks to be made offer rides to the lineup for cash. Also I've always want to try the outer bars and would let myself be towed one time just for that.
*just kidding about the spongers.
Posted by: kdallePWC's are actually prohibited from coming within 1200 feet from the shoreline in all of San Francisco County. See:
http://www.newrules.org/environment/noisesanfran.html#specialuse
There is a 200 foot wide corridor near Pier 52, and Coastguard, Fire, and Police are exempted.
As is often the case, Laws are one thing, enforcement is another.
Posted by: friend #1Caught it consistent/4'-5' with very few others at "not so secret" reef north of SC yesterday arvo. It was startling to see the "psycho" so jovial and relaxed, dude actually gave me a wave at one point. This was one of the most consistent south swells I'd seen in a lon time, new sets every minute or two.
OB on Sunday, was wondering where the crowd was because there were some nice perky waves slapping thru at the spot I found, logs were taking the south crumble-bombs way on the outside and we were sweating the reorg on the inside where it was surprisingly popping and fun. Got launched into the flats on one, into 1' of water, slammed the sandbar nicely, then later picked OB granules out of all 4 eyelids that night. My version of ASL definitely includes eyeball sand deposits.
Posted by: Ancient JettiesGood find friend #1. I got the 500' when I got into a beef with the Park Police about some lifeguards who shall remain namless who were cruising the lineup for no particular reason. 1200' mo betta. Let's jus say da charges were dropped when the head of the dept. heard what went down. i haven't seen the skis since.
Posted by: kdalleAlba Turns On Dolphins
Sexy star Jessica Alba is always careful when she's scuba diving, because she doesn't like attracting amorous dolphins.
The actress discovered the mammals got aroused by her presence when she was a youngster, shooting the dolphin drama "Flipper."
She recalls, "I don't know if anybody knows this but dolphins get excited, even when you are a human being -- and they have long, long ... (penises).
"I didn't know this until I was being poked by a few of them, which was very rude. I think I learned my lesson. I sort of request female dolphins after that because those are horny little bastards."
Alba reveals the dolphin dilemma became a constant joke at the actress' expense.
She tells MTV News, "Needless to say my closest friends and family did dolphin squeaking noises for the next five years any time they referred to me or called me or talked to me, which was pretty annoying."
Posted by: ehi,
i'm new to the site and have got a little problem i'd like to run by you.
so i have this really great, warm wetsuit. i just love it. very durable, too.
the other day i had an extended session and somehow the fit seemed to have changed. it is not a new suit, but for some reason the armpits were riding a bit high and chaffing me. like i mentioned, the suit is warm, and you can imagine my dismay at the thought of having to wear an additional layer, the rash guard. but i was in real pain so i did.
the suit had a snug fit. with the rash guard, however, there is a teenee, weennee extra bit of space between my body and the suit. this space is more pronounced where the guard is thickest, at the cuffs and waist.
so now i am in the water and most of my body is still warm. the problem is that at the beginning of almost every session, the area around my waist flushes. not my entire body, just the groin area. my chest, back, legs, arms are all okay. just my balls are freezing.
any thoughts?
Posted by: its not funHey Artifact,
I’m up for getting a ski when I settle back in here (just moved back).
I’ve got this somewhat dubious vision of going out on a big clean OB day and getting towed into a couple of bombs with a pair of water skis strapped to me – that’s gotta be fun, sure you’d be able to have some real fun on a wave…
Be a laugh on a calm day getting air on the outside as well…
Anyone have any experience with water skis in big surf? (I know it sounds pretty daft)
On a different note saw a ‘Slayer Day’ fan this arvo at a certain break, flying the banner and rocking down…!
Posted by: ankorsHey ankors, welcome back!- drop me an email artifactphoto at yahoo.com
I think Chuck Patterson who also is a ripper snow skier has water skied in to Jaws, I've heard some people talking about it somewhere before.
Posted by: artifactanybody want a pair of 5mm O'Neil booties size 9? the buggers have been squeezing my feet and I got a pair of size 11 which are much better. used about 20 times. free! will mail! (I just hate throwing all that rubber away). jd@cloudbreak.com...
and - anybody got good ideas for recyclng wetsuits? I'm chewing through them at one a year now, and it's more rubber into the landfill...
Posted by: reefboyWill do Artifact.
Seems like Chuck Patterson is a likely candidate for something silly like that. Maybe he was the guy who skis deep AK couloirs on water skis – remember seeing some nutter doing incredible things on those planks in powder on some ski vid.
I was flicking through a Jaws book the other day and there was some incredible pics of Mike Stewart getting towed in on a sponge. I can only imagine what the hell is would be like on water skis…pretty darned interesting.
The only pic I can find (the ones in the book were way more impressive)
Posted by: ankorsYou guys aren't really serious about towing-in at Ocean Beach are you?
Posted by: Jimmie